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How To Cope with a Failed Adoption in NC

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The joy of expanding your family can quickly turn to devastation when an adoption falls through. If you’ve experienced a failed adoption in North Carolina, you know all too well the emotional whirlwind it can set off — the initial excitement and hope, the crushing disappointment, the overwhelming sense of grief.

Please know that you are not alone. Failed adoptions, while incredibly painful, are relatively uncommon. Discussing adoption disruptions, dissolutions, and unregulated custody transfers (UTCs) or re-homing, the National Council for Adoption reports that:

“This is not something that is readily tracked or regularly reported on by government agencies or private entities. Although we don’t have precise numbers, adoption dissolutions are not common. Estimates of adoption dissolution range widely, with some studies showing a 1-5% dissolution rate and others indicating the rate could be as high as 9%. Most of the research on adoption dissolution focuses on adoptions from foster care; and the limited data and research on private domestic adoption and intercountry adoption indicate a lower rate of adoption dissolution compared to foster care. Although dissolution and UCT rates are quite low compared to the overall number of adoptions, they may increase as the profile of the internationally adopted child is increasingly older and primarily special needs, two factors that correlate with higher risks of dissolution.”

Though the path ahead may seem confusing and demoralizing, there are steps you can take to help cope with a failed adoption and work towards healing. In this article we’ll provide the necessary guidance and support to help you navigate this difficult time.

Practical Steps to Take After an Adoption Falls Through

When an adoption falls through, it’s important to take practical steps to protect yourself and your family’s interests. Working with an experienced adoption lawyer in North Carolina can be invaluable during this process. Here are some key actions to consider:

Understand the Adoption Disruption Process

Familiarize yourself with the laws and procedures around adoption disruptions in North Carolina. Your attorney can explain the necessary steps to formally terminate the adoption, which can vary depending on the stage of the process.

Secure Important Documents

Gather any and all paperwork/records related to the adoption. This will be crucial evidence if you decide to take legal action or pursue a refund of fees.

Review Financial Obligations

Work with your adoption lawyer to understand your financial responsibilities, such as repaying agency fees or other costs. They can help you negotiate terms and prioritize your family’s financial wellbeing.

With the right legal guidance and support system, you can begin to navigate this heartbreaking situation and lay the groundwork for a hopeful future. Remember, you don’t have to go through this alone.

Seeking Support During the Grieving Process

One of the most critical steps is to connect with a mental health professional who focuses exclusively on adoption-related issues. An adoption law attorney in North Carolina can often provide referrals to trusted counselors and therapists in your area who can give you the tools to navigate the complex grieving process and find healthy coping mechanisms.

In addition to counseling, many adoptive parents find solace in support groups, either in person or online. Sharing your story and experiences with others who have been in your shoes can provide much-needed validation and a sense of community. Your adoption lawyer may also be able to connect you with local adoption support groups or organizations.

Don’t be afraid to lean on your loved ones, as well. While they may not fully grasp the depth of your pain, allow friends and family members to listen, empathize, and offer practical help during this difficult time. Their presence alone can make a difference.

Ultimately, keep in mind that recovering from a failed adoption is a gradual process. Be patient and gentle with yourself as you work through the grief. With the right support system and coping tools in place, you can begin to heal.

Maintaining Hope for Future Adoption Opportunities

After the devastation of a failed adoption, it can be hard to envision a positive way forward. But with time, support, and the guidance of an experienced adoption lawyer in North Carolina, you can regain hope and keep moving closer to your dream of building a family. Remember that a disrupted adoption does not mean all future adoption opportunities are lost. Many families who have experienced a failed adoption go on to have successful placements down the line. 

Working with an Experienced Adoption Lawyer in North Carolina

The importance of working with an experienced adoption lawyer cannot be overstated. These legal professionals possess the necessary knowledge and skills to guide you through the process while protecting your rights and interests.

An adoption lawyer can be an invaluable asset in several ways:

Navigating Legal Procedures: They can ensure you follow all legal protocols and file all the required paperwork when an adoption disruption occurs, helping to minimize further stress and confusion.

Pursuing Financial Recourse: Your attorney can review your financial obligations and work to recoup any fees or costs related to the failed adoption, if possible.

Providing Emotional Support: Adoption lawyers often have strong relationships with local counselors and support groups. These connections can prove to be invaluable during the coping process.

Exploring Future Options: Looking ahead, an adoption attorney can advise you on your options for future adoptions and help you develop a comprehensive plan to achieve your goal of building a family.

When you’re experiencing the heartbreak of a failed adoption, having a trusted legal advocate by your side can make all the difference.

Mills Adoption Law: Experience for What Matters Most — Family

Have you been searching “lawyers for adoption near me?” Consult attorneys who focus exclusively on adoption law. Bobby Mills, founding attorney of Mills Adoption Law, has over 35 years of hands-on experience. Having represented all members of the adoption triad—adoptive parents, birth parents, and adoptees—he has seen things and can anticipate problems other attorneys will not anticipate. Through his work on thousands of cases, he truly understands how to navigate the legal system and stand up for families. If you are seeking to adopt a child in North Carolina,  contact him at (919) 306-2899, or complete the online form to schedule your free, 15-minute consultation.

Copyright © 2024. Mills Adoption Law. All rights reserved.

The information in this blog post (“post”) is provided for general informational purposes only and may not reflect the current law in your jurisdiction. No information in this post should be construed as legal advice from the individual author or the law firm, nor is it intended to be a substitute for legal counsel on any subject matter. No reader of this post should act or refrain from acting based on any information included in or accessible through this post without seeking the appropriate legal or other professional advice on the particular facts and circumstances at issue from a lawyer licensed in the recipient’s state, country, or other appropriate licensing jurisdiction.

Mills Adoption Law
4600 Marriott Dr, Ste 350
Raleigh, NC 27612
(919) 306-2899
https://www.millsadoptionlaw.com/

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